the frogs love a good protest

Sorry it's been a while since a worthy blog, the internet in the places we're staying at seems to be getting more and more expensive and spare time has been scarce. So! The last I wrote was in Barcelona, which I have said my fond, but temporary, farewell to. I'm meeting up with some people I met there when I go back on my own which should be awesome. I also met a guy from brisbane who rides these weird bike cab things for a job, and he told me about this awesome awesome place in Grenada.

Apparently they've just recently renovated the old gypsy caves by the beach, and you can stay in them really cheap. Could I possibly stay in a cooler place? I don't think so. So super stoked for that. But anyway, left Barcelona on an amazing note having dinner with some of the girls on the tour and literally nearly peeing my pants laughing over stupid shit. We had some yummy yummy tapas for dinner and then had some gelato before heading back to the hotel and having some drinks to farewell the people that hopped off at Barca. I said goodbye to my two favourite girls on the tour which was sad, but we're on facebook and stuff, and one of them is meeting up with me again in Rome, so that should be cool.

So we left Barca and headed to the French Riviera - and the weather took a pretty awful turn. Cloudy, cold and moggy. We stopped off at a perfumery which was pretty damn interesting, and I did a tiny bit of shopping, which was cool. Did you know it takes 4 tonnes of orange blossoms to make one litre of essential oils? How insane is that? After an incredible dinner in Nice, I turned into an old lady and went to bed at about 9pm. I hadn't slept the past two nights at all, so it finally caught up with me and I had a killer sleep - until about 6am when I heard screaming from outside the hotel.

It might have been on the news in Australia, but there was some crazy rioting all over France about raising the retirement age from 60 to 62. There was all out riots throughout the main street of Nice, even in the awful weather, and there were smoke bombs everywhere. Despite that and the awful weather, I made my way down to the Old Chateau, all the way to the top of the waterfall, and then down to the beach. The stones? Yikes. My feet were pretty unhappy with me. I also spent about 3 hours trying to ask someone where the vet was, because there was a poor little injured pigeon near the water. Honestly, up until that point, the French had been kind and more than accomodating. But the locals in Nice? Obnoxious bastards, seriously. I was really surprised. I did, however, buy a really awesome dress - so it wasn't all bad! I also bought an FC barcelona poofy pillow thing. So far? best 8 euros I've spent. It's actually incredible. It hasn't left my side since I bought it.

That night we headed off to Monaco, and the Monte Carlo Casino. The drive was great, and the buildings were really spectacular. I didn't actually go into the casino, because I thought 40 euro entry fee (roughly $70) was steep to say the least, especially when I don't gamble hah. Dan told me it was just one big room anyway, and you can't take photos inside. So instead, I had dinner with two of the nice girls on the tour. A really great ( and cheap! ) 3 course meal and some yum coffee before we headed back to the hotel for a 6am leaving time to get to Switzerland today.

Well. The weather is really awful! I want my European summer back. The drive was about 12 hours today, and the Italian truck stops are seriously complete chaos. It's like a mosh pit hah. And the system is weird? You have to pay at one register, then she gives you a ticket, then you take it to the next register and she gets out what you want, and then you have to take that food to another register and they cook it? Surely this could all be done by one person! Or at least on one station, not 3 stops for a toasted sandwich thing. Another quirky cultural thing? You have to pay for toilets over here. None of this free business. You've gotta pay for the priviledge to empty your bladder. It's usually around 2 euro? Roughly $3. Lucky for me, I'm kind of a camel. So I'm saving quite a bit of money just holding it in.

So we arrived in Switzerland, and despite the shitty weather, it's still really beautiful. There's a bit of blue sky dotted here and there right now, so I'm hoping it will clear up tomorrow when we head down to Lucerne. We got a cable car up the mountain to our hotel and so far? It's...very dodgy to say the least. One receptionist girl that was sleeping when we got here today at 7pm. I get to my room, it's freezing, the lights all flicker and we apparently have no hot water in the entire place. The thermostat says it's -2 degrees outside.

We're having fondu for dinner tonight, so I'm hoping that will salvage this place a little for me. Tomorrow we're heading down to Lucerne to look at some swiss army knives, and have lunch and shit and I'm taking off away from the rest of the tour to go on a little hike on my own. On the cable car I spotted a pretty awesome beginner's track and there was all deer and shit, so that seems right up my alley at the moment. Been stuffing my face with snacks for these 12+ hour drives, so I need to get my legs moving! We have a nine hour walking tour in Rome in a few days, so I need to be pretty in shape for that.

Official 'Parlez-Vous Francais?' clip - Art vs Science

el guapa

Arrived about six o'clock last night in BARTHELONA. Yes, that's how I spell it - so the Catalan accent is fully appreciated ( as it should be ! ) got some wicked shots of La Sangrada Familia? I think that's how you spell it. Guadi's big ass, old church that is still under construction. I tell you what, I wa slooking forward to it - but it's ten thousand times more amazing when you see it in person. You just can't imagine the amount of detail, dedication and foresight went into it.

It's so humid here, I tell you what. But we had a really great dinner last night provided by the hotel too. Turns out I am a huuuuge fan of gespacha. There is nothing better at the end of a boiling hot day than a huge bowl of cold tomato, cucumber, olive oil etc. soup. It's amazing. But this is where shit really starts to get good. My 6 lessons of Spanish paid off sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much. A few people have literally confused me for a local ( which goes great in taxis, they don't try to rip me off! ).

So last night I paid about 7 euros to see a flamenco show. It was only 15 minutes, and they looked constipated the entire time - but all in all it was a pretty cool way to pass half an hour. And in Barca? You need to find stuff to do to pass the time while waiting for the nightlife to spring into action. None of the nightclubs are even open before 2am. I ended up at this awesome place called the Porta De Olympia, which is the main nightclubbing spot in Barca. I tell you what, amazing nightlife over here. But we got there about 2am, this really nice guy Near from Perth and this great girl Becca from California.

The clubs here are very different to back home. Every nightclub has a group of strippers that just kind of, prance around on the bar. I nearly got a severed thumb from a stray 20 inch stiletto. Wouldn't that have been an embarrassing injury? I don't think it's intentional, but the clubs are super segregated too. There was one, Tamancas that was full of Asians, the next bar was an Australian Bar full of Americans and eventually I found a Roman themed one called Olympus that seemed packed with locals.

What a night.

First it was 2euro tequila shots, then free tequila shots because I met some guys that had a bar card so I got it for free ( ; Met a local and spent most of the night with him, Eban, and he did not speak one word of english. Not hello, goodbye, sorry, thank you etc. Not one word. So my Spanish has improved so much after jumping into the deep end and it was great! The funniest thing ever though, I was trying to compliment him. And the word for handsome in Spanish is El Guapo. But for some reason, I kept saying El Guapa. El Guapa is like, the feminine version - like pretty or beautiful. And he kept replying with El Guapo, so I thought he was complimenting me. SUPER LAUGHING when we eventually figured it out. Not kidding, I nearly fell over I was laughing so hard. However, didn't get back until 7am, and then had to get up so I could get some breakfast so I am running on no sleep at the moment.

Not really in a rush to go out and do stuff today, my feet really, really, really need a rest - especially because we're going to Niece tomorrow and they don't have sandy beaches, they have pebbly beaches. So I'm giving my feet and my body a break after last night and have just been re-filling my belly and chilling out by the pool in the gorgeous sun. Feeling so incredibly chilled and content. I don't want to leave! heheh.

Tonight we're all going as a group to find some cool tapas bar. That's the great thing about this tour really, there are littel groups sure, but as a whole, we try to do stuff all together as much as possible. There are some incredibly amazingly nice people on this tour - seriously.

Really in a great mood today, despite being incredibly hungover. Money-wise I'm doing really well, which is cool. I've only bought myself one thing for 20 euros! And it's really awesome and by far worth so much more, so I'm proud. I'm saving Camp Nou for when I come back, because the football tickets for Madrid and FC Barca are sold out already from members. Kind of upset, but I figure it's just not meant to be this time.

After all, Pique will be in Barca for a long time to come!

And on that note, I have some Spanish soap operas to watch in my air-conditioned hotel room while stuffing my face with bolognaise flavoured Lays. Life is fucking great.

checking in

hey guys, not a big blog tonight. seven euro for half an hour of internet, ten euro for a can of coke - I'm not too happy. I'm in a very foul mood tonight, despite the free dinner being great. Just kind of hot and bothered and tired from no sleep last night, and today was anotther day of a good 9 hours on the bus. We visited Carcassonne today and did a wine tasting in Bordeaux. It was great, and I bought an awesome little necklace for myself. The sun here is just incredible.

But as I said before, just not in the best mood tonight and I'm about to head off to bed. Awkward? I have to share the bed with some random woman on the tour - and in the room, it's two single beds pushed together and they're bolted to the floor so we can't even move them. So unfortunately I predict yet another sleepless night, and tomorrow is a big booze up in Barcelona - so I hope I can last the distance on just a few hours sleep. Who am I kidding? It's Barcelona, I'll be fine!

I'm a little homesick too, missing everyone like crazy and with the time difference it's nearly impossible to call at a reasonable hour. But I'm just being a pansy, once I get a good night's sleep tonight - I'll be right as rain tomorrow. After all IT'S SPAIN. ASKJDHASKGDFJGSDGSDKGDF.

And Andorra for like a few hours hah. but SPAIN.
WOO

I promise there will be a super awesome blog entry the day after tomorrow way cooler than this one hah.

photos!

Going to use this advantage in this poky little hostel in Bordeaux to upload some photos while I have the chance. This internet shits on Paris!

For Ben and Renee - being 'that guy' in Paris

Chateau Chambord

I'm a loser that takes myspace photos because I don't want my camera stolen

take 2!

I'll update hte blog with useful shit later - right now I have to run off to a wine tour!

frespanglish?

so today was pretty amazing. I woke up magically 30 seconds before my alarm went off - talk about an incredible internal clock. I'm so switched on to Paris time already hah. So sorry for no pictures, this internet is about as useless as they come. But anyway! I woke up at like 6am this morning, got my shit totally together and I was out the door at 7am before more than 3/4 of my tour had even awoken. I made 3 maps that I didn't even use because my sense of direction here is just that fantastic (especially when everything I wanted to see was along the river Seine (; ).

I started off the day with a metro trip to Notre Dame. The tour guides were less than helpful, but that's cool - I like to do shit on my own anyway. So it was pretty majestic inside, it has a definite presence in the church area. It's hard to explain the grandeur, similar to that of the Opera, which I'll get into later. But it's definitely a pretty fucking magical place. Those large stained glass things just blew my mind. I then got in line to go see the belltower - how could I miss it?! As many of you know, I'm an avid reader of the Hunchback of Notre Dame, so I was super stoked to see if I could find the inscriotion that the entire book was based on. Unfortunately, 387 tiny steps later, I find out that that part of the church wasn't restored. Devs. But I met a pretty cool American family in line, from Masechusetts. Had an adorable, although kind of precocious, eleven year old girl called Ellie. She was bundles of fun.

The view was incredible, needless to say and I could not have asked for a more perfect day weatherwise. Not a cloud in the sky and a beautiful breeze.

After Notre Dame, (which took 3 hours longer than expected because of a slow old lady at the front of the group holding everyone up) I had to skip the Lourve. To be honest? I wasn't going to wait 3 hours to see a portrait sized photo. The Lourve never really interested me anyway. But! Now here it gets awesome. Some freaky Frenchman in a leather jacket with wild hair was making a bomb threat? So he got crash tackled by security guards like a metre in front of me before he squirmed free and ran off. They knew him as Jacques, so I'm assuming it's a regular thing for him? I thought it was pretty hilarious.

Making my way through the streets like a regular Parisian, I found my way to, by far the thing i was most excited about - Opera Garnier, Place De La Opera, Opera. It's the old opera house, essentially. The inspiration, it is believed, for hte Phantom of the Opera. Once again, tour guides were tres shit. But that, once again, worked out well because I found all these amazing little rooms. Not kidding, every time I moved my eyes I was rendered breatheless. The amount of gold, and just...magnificence of the place. It's unlike anything I have ever seen before in my life. Think, kind of like older parts of the city - but upkept and smothered in gold and marble and inscriptioons etc. I got some amaaaaazing photos. The souvenier shop was tres shit too. But that's cool, I did what I could. And my photos are souveniers enough!

Apparently I cant' spell souveniers. But I don't care (;

All right. Now for the juicy shit. After the Opera, I was paranoid I would be late for the bike tour so I grabbed a croissant on the run and made my way to the Eiffel Tower. A fucking walk, I tell you. I have massive blisters by this stage, that give me random cushioning when I walk. You know, painful cushions. I brisked through the Madeline Church and the Rue De La Concorde (kill me if that's spelt wrong) and crossed the Alexandre III's church. Fuck. So much gold. It literally puts the sun to shame - especially aruond midday when I was there. I was just about blinded.

Now, the bike tour met up at 3pm under the tower, but I got there at 2 because im just that organised. This is where things get good, I promise. So I'm sitting there, minding my own business and writing in my journal - when suddenly I hear someone speaking French a little too close for my liking. So I turn around and BAM RIFLE IN MY FACE. Yup. French Militants protecting the tower. The dick hadn't seen me, gotten too close and was talking into his radio while looking up at the tower. Thanks guys. Appreciate it.

And as soon as the militant disappears, I suddenly get bombarded with an over zealous gypsy wanting to sell me a scarf with the Eiffel Tower on it. As usual, no matter what he says, I just say non non non. He called me lady gaga, and 'hakuna matata' about 10 times and I was getting the shits. So I stamped my foot and said NON. There was two French guys sitting near me, just chilling in the sun that I didn't really pay much attention too. That is - until this fucking gypsy started trying to touch me, trying to wrap the scarf around my neck etc. This is kind of graphic, if you have a weak stomach, don't read the next sentence. In an act of strange divine intervention, I leapt to my feet and shoved him off - with an almighty popping and squelching erupting from my right heel. By now? The blisters were the size of Euros ( see what I did there? ) and that extra bit of pressure caused one of them to just like...explode. It was epic - it neded to be in slow-motion with some theme music too. But it got all over the fucker's ankle - the pop-squelch-blister had quite a range of pus. One of the boys came up and started cursing at him in French and eventually he just pissed off. The two boys? Gilam and Jonathon. Easily the coolest people I have ever met in my life. They're 19 and are moving to Moscow tomorrow for 9 months. How fucking cool is that?

I hung out with them later by the River Steine and downed some rad Tequila sunrises while waving at locals on boats and discussing coconuts in our broken frespanglish. Frespanglish because they come from down south, near Spain - and my French is just insulting. Apparently shaking hands is a laughable greeting in Paris. A kiss on each cheek with lips nearly touching seems to be the way to go. Gotta say I was a tiny bit weirded out. But anyway, we had a wicked time before departing - but Jonathon and I are still talking. He's hilarious.

I got back to my hotel room tonight feeling a little sick. I had a good breakfast, and a croissant for lunch but haven't had time for dinner and I have a bit of sunstroke I think. Which is all good because my tan is looking fresh. But I'm starving and it's late. So I think I'll sleep this hunger off and deal with it efficiently in the morning. Those blisters? Pretty fucking rank right now. They're huuuuge.

Gargantuan even.

To be honest? Kind of devastated I'll probably never seen Jon again. Easily one of the most awesome guys I've ever met, and he's abandoning Paris for some freezing vodka-drenched wasteland. Silly,silly boy.

No clue what's on tomorrow, and way too comfortable right now to get out of bed and go check. I'll just make sure to be up early.

Also. What the fuck. My frespanglish is making my english worse, I swear. I'm trying to talk to Gilam and Jon in simplified English, and now, after spending most of the night with them, I can't seem to form proper sentences. WIN.

Fuck, before I forget - parlez vous francais is the best song ever. And I must share the coconut story with you. I promise it is awesome. Jon was explaining to me how him and Gilam had been spending the day. From what I could understand of our frespanglish, they went into a fruit shop, saw a coconut and bought it. They then preceeded, shirtless, down to the Seine to enjoy the juice inside. But - a dilemma! They couldn't open the fucking thing. So they asked aruond, and managed to find a swiss army knife and they went to drink - only to find there was no juice inside. So they then cut the cocnut into pieces and threw it at people instead. I dont know why? But I nearly died laughing at it and the rest of the night was spent joking about coconuts.

I think I'm rambling now - so I'll stop and head off to bed. Night!

forgetting sarah wellington

so it's nearly midnight, and I've been up since 2am - so this blog will probably be a short one even though so much has happened today. I woke up bright and chippy after my unexpected nap. I only planned on sleeping maybe 2-3 hours - but my body seemed to think 12 was a better idea. Unfortunately I missed out on the Notting Hill Carnival in London but to be honest from what the others said I just missed out on some violent drunken gypsies. So it was probably better I got an amazing sleep in! So I was all ready to go in the morning bar one thing - breakfast. I seem to be very unlucky with getting food over here. Anyway, so I am told by one of the people on the tour that there is a starbucks 'just down the road'. So, me being a typical tourist in shorts and a t-shirt ( A PARIS T-SHIRT NO LESS. Yes Ben and Renee, today I was 'that guy' - just for you two ! ) I'm wandering around at 530am looking for something open and edible.

No starbucks, but after an hour or so of searching I found the beacon of hope for all travelers - Mcdonalds. After that it was on the bus. I met our Tour Guide who, no joke, looks EXACTLY like the wolf pack guy from the hangover. If that guy, and Emile Hirsch in the wilder parts of Into the Wild had a love child - it would be Dan. But he's great. Um. 99% of the tour are 25ish couples from Sydney, so that's a bit weird for me. But they're all so incredibly nice and stuff, so I'm having a ball. Today we took the bus from London to Dover to catch a ferry into Cassailles? I think that's how you spell it. Anyway, we saw the white cliffs which were beautiful and I had hell trying to get money out. Had a moment of homesickness and called Tim ( thanks for listening! ) but that soon cleared up as well as my mild sea sickness.

The day is so beautiful over here. I got away in tiny shorts, sandals and a light t-shirt all day. Albeit we spent most of it on a bus. But anyway, there is this running joke about this girl Sarah Wellington who's paper work was all fucked up and it said she was supposed to be meeting us in London when in fact we're picking her up in Rome. So the whole trip dan is like 'WHERE IS SARAH WELLINGTON?!' and as a joke, when he's trying to remember 42 people's names, we all respond as sarah wellington. Hah. So a lot happened today, fuck. And tomorrow - my God. That will be a momentous blog entry, I promise. Fuckload of photos and shit too.

But today, we went on a bus tour of Paris, which was lovely. There is just so much to see and do, and I know I can't get it done in the one day we have here. Today we stopped at the Montmarte, a beautiful building that I got a few photos of. But here is where I got my first real test as a tourist and, according to both the guide, the bus driver and a travel agent on tour with us - I passed with flying colours! There are these men who (and I am not being racist, just honest ) are all black, that hang out outside popular tourist destinations as proffessional thieves. These type are called 'string men' and they have colourful strings that they tie around your finger while talking to you, and simply refuse to let go until you give them money. It sounds insane right? But the amount of peopel I saw handing over euros was amazing. They would have made hundreds of euros in the 3 or so hours we were there. Anyway, one approached me and I simply said 'no no no'. He persisted with things like 'hello beautiful, hakuna matata' etc. and then he started to touch my arm, side etc. So I raised my voice NO, and started to walk off. He followed, as all thieves in Paris are apparently notoriously persistant, and finally I shoved him away. I think he was shaken that I'd reacted, and he left me alone.

I was so proud!

Got some lovely photos and I took a 45 minute detour with a French University student with such a typical Parisian name of Jon-Pierre, as he showed me where the ATM was. I had a really wicked leek pie for lunch and got to buy a pretty cool shirt for 30 euros or so. Tonight we did a bus tour that got a bit tedious - especially when my camera runs out of battery at........you guessed it - the eiffel tower. Such a massive fail.

But all is well! Because tomorrow, I have it all planned out on my map. I'll be up in 7 hours to take the metro down to Notre Dame, then walk my way back past the Lourve (hopefully the Old Opera House if I plan it right) for a 3pm bike tour of Paris starting at the Eiffel Tower. It's run by American Scholars that are the definite experts on French History. Could my life be anymore amazing? But wait. There's more. After the bike tour, I'm going up the Eiffel Tower - then with teh group I'm having a picnic underneath it. But wait - THERE'S MORE. After that dinner, I'm off to a cabaret show. Tomorrow is a jam-packed day and I am literally trembling with excitement.

There really is so much beauty and history to Paris - I am definitely coming back!